Thursday, May 5, 2011

It's GOD's plan

"Okay son it's up to you and I think you make the right decision, you have faced tough situation"
With his full of sympathy eyes , the head of the computer engineering department, where I was studying, said these words to me just before signing my request to postponed my academic year. I left his room and am telling myself how it'll be right decision to leave the college maybe for the last time since my family was planning to send me over to Egypt, and how it shall be better and am losing a whole year of my life, everybody I met in the last 10 days was saying the famous Iraqi proverb which means something like that the God gave you new bread in this world and bread means life here. Maybe you are wondering why are they saying that??
Let’s go back ten days through the time and exactly to Tuesday the 21st of February 2006 sometime between 7 and 8 p.m. I was walking with fast steps through the dark street somewhere unknown to me in Baghdad without my glasses so I was a semi-blind and with a confused mind. I was thinking about his words to me "jump and walk directly, don't turn your face or we'll shot you down". I was breathing hardly and taking as much fresh air as I can and telling myself "don't turn your face don't just don't, I’m free, I’m free", I tried to collect my thoughts and my mind just like collecting the remains of a smashed painting and it was hard but I finally did it and opened my eyes I have walked for 5 minutes and they are far by now and also it looks like am going nowhere since it was very dark and the way in front of me was blocked so I turned back and I saw nothing just far cars' lights and what looks like a highway so I started to walk faster in the opposite direction till I reached the highway and stopped a taxi to my home, all the way to home the taxi driver was giving me weird looks since my beard get a one side shaving and I was looking just like mentally retarded person. 15 minutes later I was at home with my family again they were crying and shouting, everybody was hugging me and kissing me all the family, relatives and neighbors, at this moment my mind has restored, after 43 day of kidnapping by a gang, I am free.
I have spent the few next hours talking with my family about what happened to me there, and I admit that they were in worse condition than me, after that I took a two hours bath to wash every thing even the bad memories.
Only 12 hours after my freedom the worst happened, at Wednesday the 22nd of February 2006 unknown armed insurgents bombed the holy shrine of Shiites in Samara which was the green light to begin the worst times that Iraqis went through. But for me the next ten days were about proving that I'm in good and healthy mental abilities to my friends who thought if I would come back then I'd be crazy or damaged, lol, and mainly it was about thinking what to do next. I had two options of either resume my study and my normal life or postponed everything and leave Iraq.
"My son Ali I'm afraid that something wrong happens to you again, you can't stay in one place for long time to be safe so stay away for some time, and don't worry about your future and about what will happen, because God has his plans for you"
It was My grandfather's words this man was my Godfather the man who raised me and taught me everything I know about life, so it was the final decision to postponed and leave everything behind me and go toward unknown. I did the paper work and I deleted a whole year from my life in no time, but the travel procedure takes longer than expected, and day after day I was blaming myself more and more for leaving the university till that Monday's early morning at the 12th of May 2006. I was staring at the cell, the walls, the doors and the furniture of my home that I'm leaving for the first time without knowing if I'll ever come back again, I walked through our big garden and all the way I was thinking if it's right what I'm doing. My older uncle, his son and also all the luggage were in the car that would take us to Jordan I saw it outside our main door and I said to myself OK God's plan is not clear for me and I am not sure if it even exists then I said goodbye to my mother and closed the door.
Now it's the 6th of May 2011, two days ago I went off the taxi and opened the house door "Okay my love go ahead", she went inside and as she does every day "Salam alaikum" and I laughed again "Ok you're not going to skip it for even one day, saying hello to an empty house??!!", she replied "No, my Mom told me to do that, saying hello to the house's angels", I laughed each time she does it, but deep inside I was thinking this is so cute. She was warming launch and I was standing next to her, I have returned to Iraq 4 years ago, I resumed my academic study at the same university and two years ago it was my graduation, and now I am opening my house door, my own house and having the best woman that any man on earth wishes to have, having a good job and every body who knows me call me a successful man. five years ago I closed my family house's door and I was wondering what my grandfather (may God be merciful with his soul) meant by God has his own plans for you, but now I am opening my own door and I know that I have got all what I dreamed to have and much more with much easier ways these are God's ways and this is it "it's God's plans for me", so I love to think that God has his own plan for Iraq and everybody.

R.I.P my grandfather

3 comments:

  1. even though i am one of your close friends i feel strange reading this even though i remember those dismal days well. like a fairy tail
    wish you eternal happiness from all my heart and may god never subject anyone anymore to that ghastly ordeal

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  2. I think in a very mysterious way what happened to you was a bless, if it wasn't for it your family never would have moved and we never would have met!! God did have everything planned for you.

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  3. Out of curiosity, are you Muslim?

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